David Bowie Ain’t Got Nothin’ On Me…

In another world, in a different time, David Bowie sang that it was time to turn and face the strange changes

Indeed.

In the same song, he also said he didn’t want to be a richer man, instead, he was just gonna have to be a different man.

Yes, indeed.

While I wouldn’t sneeze at the opportunity to be a little more financially independent, being rich materialistically is not one of my life-shaping goals.

I’m just gonna have to be a different man.

How many times can a guy say indeed in one blog post?
Apparently, at least five times…

So once again, indeed.

I am just gonna have to be a different man and I am.

Strange changes abound. Strange changes indeed.

I suspect as long as I am alive, there will occasionally be moments of anger and pain, heartache and rage–yes, joy comes in the morning, but there are plenty more nights of questions and grief to come.

And I am ok with that.

Indeed (somebody stop me…).
There’s one of those strange changes… I have learned to not be afraid of it–grief serves its purpose and while tears can be bitter, they can also be cleansing…

I am thankful for many of the changes in my life.
I am thankful for lessons learned.

My reality has changed.
I am enjoying life.
To quote the Foo Fighters, who will have their own post fairly soon (as in almost done), I am learning to walk again…

Strange Changes.

I am wrestling with a new name for my blog. Desperately Wanting to Believe Again has served it’s purpose. I never quit believing. I do believe. I still struggle with trust at times, but I trust God even if I don’t always understand.

I am done with bitterness. I may be bitter at times or for a moment, but I never want to embrace bitterness again.

I may still have hurt. Pain will raise itself once in awhile, but I never want to be that guy again whose hurt turns him into a pariah.

It’s time to move forward.
It’s time time live again.
And I am.
I am.

Ok. So I am blathering on like the crazy strange man I am.

Four more things:

1. I am going to recommit to writing here more often–giving it the good old college try (whatever that means).

2. I am going to make significant progress on my book (call the first two New Year resolutions if you want).

3. If you have an idea for a new blog name reflecting my new reality, please share it ASAP.

4. Here’s a sermon from the first Sunday of 2015 (last week)–it ends with what I call a story of redemption, restoration, and reconciliation…

God bless and Happy New Year!

Les Ferguson, Jr.

and oh yeah, one more piece of happiness…

My beautiful wife and our new house in Madison, Mississippi! (This picture was from yesterday–after we closed on the house!)

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The Morning Fog

One day this past winter, Becki and I took an hour long walk down an old gravel road not far from our house.

It is a narrow road with hardly enough room for two cars to pass in most places. It winds and twists through hills and gullies and steep ravines. The trees tower over both sides of the road, creating a sunlight canopy in places.

It is one of my favorite places to walk or run. Very quiet and secluded. In fact, I can only remember meeting somebody on that road a very few times–mostly during deer hunting season.

I get a sense of peace and tranquility from the beauty of God’s creation on display. Wildlife is plentiful on this road. We’ve seen deer, turkey, and even a bobcat or two.

But on this particular day I was hurting. Enough so that I actually started this blog post, but got no further than a blank document with a two word title attached to it, although not the same title you see now.

Life is so extremely transient.

Planned changes/ directions often take a far different and unexpected tack.

Unplanned or unprepared for changes can not only take the wind out of your sails, but also leave you floundering at best or sinking at worst.

Like I said, life is so extremely transient.

Some of you who read this have the ability to look backward and see exactly how your life took shape as planned accordingly. And that’s a blessing.

Others of us look back at our lives and wonder how we got here–maybe we marvel at the unexpected while appreciating just how things developed. Certainly there can be a blessing in that.

And still others of us thought we had a plan and were working it. But then, the hull of our ship sustained massive damage. As we sink, we can’t help but wonder where the blessing is in that…

One of my blessings is the renewed ability to live in the moment. At least better than I did before. I still struggle with wanting security. I still wrestle hard with patience and wanting to know how God is going to make all of this work out now!

But, I am much more cognizant of the transitory nature of this earthly existence. I try to relish the moments where joy is found.

Things change.

Sometimes to our benefit.

Sometimes not.

Sometimes we can anticipate the changes.

Sometimes not.

Regardless, change is coming to your life and to mine.

As I write this, one of my closest friends, another long time preaching buddy, is sitting with his father, waiting on the Heavenly Father to call his Dad home. Awaiting one of the biggest changes in both their lives. There will be tears. There will be the knowledge of God’s presence. (If you will, pray for the family of Bill Huggins)

Change happens.

On that late winter walk referenced above, we found an old homestead off the road and in the woods.

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I wonder who once lived there.

I wonder what changes occurred in their lives.

I wonder how a place of hearth and home gets abandoned and slowly reclaimed by nature.

And I am reminded of the words of James 4:14, How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone. (NLT)

As David Bowie once said, Turn and face the strange changes… 

Life can be stranger than fiction. But be sure, change is coming, somehow, someway.

May your change be blessed.

Thanks for reading.

Les Ferguson, Jr.