I am quite sure you’ve heard the quaint old cliche “it ain’t over ’till the fat lady sings.”
Hold that thought for just a minute or two.
Most of us are ill-equipped to deal with grief.
There is no way to ever be completely ready.
Not at the beginning.
Not in ourselves.
Not in others.
Grieving is too complex an issue.
Much has been written about the stages of grief. What I am finding is whether you are new to grief or in a decades long relationship, the grieving are all over the map. In fact, I am hearing stories from fellow grievers detailing short-term and lifelong grieving processes that may never completely end this side of the great divide.
And God how I wish I didn’t, but I get that. I really really do.
After the funeral or graveside service or however you address death’s finality on this side of the ether plains, it isn’t over. Not by a long shot.
You may think the fat lady has sung.
She hasn’t begun to tickle those vocal cords in warm-up mode.
She doesn’t even know what the song will be.
So what happens after the funeral and everybody goes home?
The world keeps spinning.
Through the tears and the pain a hard fought new reality comes into existence.
And the song the fat lady sings? It is being written and rewritten over and over again.
Some of your friends and family will hear it with you; some won’t.
Some of your friends and family will sing it with you; some won’t.
But one of these days, the fat lady will sing.
I think I hear her warming up.